Wednesday, July 23, 2003
i'll come back to the previous post later. i just had a flashback. . .the girls were talking and I hear a "the thought of someone seeing me naked is scary" and i have another memory. and all goes on around me and no one knows that i've just reverted into anotehr mood. I need Josh, but he's 700 miles away and it's just hard to talk about when on IM.
i remember that voice on the phone, that horrible tone telling me that I'd have to get naked in front of a group of people. how embarassing that would be. i probably shouldn't be fighting this on my own. i have friends that God has placed in my life to be there for me, i have a boyfriend who would so be here for me right now if he weren't 700 miles away.
i told josh just a little while ago. it really helped to admit to having a flashback to someone. he's there for me, only in spirit :-( right now, but i know he's there for me. I'm grateful to God that I have jenny, josh, lindsay, all my friends who can be there to put a smile back on my face.
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i remember that voice on the phone, that horrible tone telling me that I'd have to get naked in front of a group of people. how embarassing that would be. i probably shouldn't be fighting this on my own. i have friends that God has placed in my life to be there for me, i have a boyfriend who would so be here for me right now if he weren't 700 miles away.
i told josh just a little while ago. it really helped to admit to having a flashback to someone. he's there for me, only in spirit :-( right now, but i know he's there for me. I'm grateful to God that I have jenny, josh, lindsay, all my friends who can be there to put a smile back on my face.
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